I apparently jinxed myself with the last post. As soon as I state that life has been good to me, I was thrown a curve ball. I have become a victim of the economy and was laid off. The rest of my week was spent taking it way too personally and eating cookies.

I also managed to work five consecutive 12+ hour days on the set of a short film. But that is another story for another day.

So after demanding that Dan let me feel sorry for myself and cry for a full 24 hours, I realized something. Being unemployed is kind of a blessing right now. I can focus on school, the store and upcoming craft fairs. I can finish all the projects that had to be abandoned due to my stress level the past few weeks. I can clean the house. (Not that it’s a distaster zone… Hi Mom!)

More importantly, I can take some Me time. Dan wants me to look at this as the reinvention of Sara. I originally took this to mean that he doesn’t like me the way that I am. After we got over that fight, I realized that he was right. It was time for me to figure out what I want to do when I “grow up.” I need to figure out what I want to accomplish after school and what my long term goals are for the store. I need to decide if the film industry is calling my name or if a stable business job is the way to go. I need to figure out what I want.

This led to more cookies, but it also led to the realization that I may need to blog less often. I need to focus on the here and now. I need to fill the store with oodles of cards, stock up for the craft fairs and begin production on my stamp line. (3 designs so far!) I need to catch up on school work and put my resume out there. I need to catch up with family and friends and take my phone off silent mode. There’s dogs to groom, cats to play with, gardens to tend to and one house plant left to keep alive. There’s Christmas cards to make and birthday presents to ship and Halloween decorations to put up.

Life goes on, even if this particular career will not. I think it might be life’s way of telling me not to settle for a job that I liked but didn’t love. It was time to find the real me, find my calling and figure out the future.

For the record, I love being a Lady of Leisure. I could see it being my future if Dan wasn’t such a fuddy duddy. He’s rolling his eyes as he reads this…

Whenever I am pleased with something, I compose a love letter to it. Typically, the letter is out loud and Dan is the only one who hears it. For example…

Dear Kickin’ New Heels That I Got for 70% Off,
I love you.
Loooooooooove,
Sara

You’ve really got to draw out the “o” sound in love, otherwise it means less.

I used to get funny looks from Dan but he’s learned to ignore me rather well. In fact, he’s started adopting the habit. In the past few weeks, we as a team have composed love letters to:

- Sandwiches
- Sims 3
- Energy Drinks
- My pillow
- Cranberry jelly
- A chocolate chip cookie
- My camera
- You Tube
- commercials with puppies in them
- pink nail polish
- the clothes steamer
- My car
- My car’s new air freshener
- dill pickles (obviously, not my love letter)
- fresh tomato (ditto)
- Disneyland
- bubble baths (also, surprisingly, not my love letter)

Due to recent frustrations at work, I have also begun to compose hate letters in my head.

Dear Subcontractor,
What do you not understand about the term “deadline?” When I say “due by May 15th,” I don’t mean “it’s ok to turn it in on June 10th.” You make me really mad. So mad that I would like you to come over here and stand really still so I can punch you in the face.
Loooooooooove,
Sara

Ironically, some of my coworkers still call me the sweet, quiet one in the office.